utter randomonium

Quick quick

Posted by melydia on November 30, 2004 No comment

Too lazy to read the book? Too busy to see the movie? They’ve got you covered.

National Treasure

Posted by melydia on November 24, 2004 No comment

National Treasure: This, my friends, is a very silly movie. It tries to be Indiana Jones meets The Da Vinci Code: Nicolas Cage plays a man attempting to find an ancient treasure which was hidden from the British back in the Revolutionary War, the map to which is supposedly on the back of the Declaration of Independence. Believe it or not, the premise is far from the most ridiculous part of this film.

I laughed every time someone pulled a fact or a theory out of thin air and it ended up being exactly the correct interpretation of the clue (apparently practice makes perfect: they took 30 years to puzzle out the meaning of “the secret lies with charlotte” and maybe a week to get the rest). I laughed even harder at the logical errors: more than once I wondered, “How would he have known about that?” Ah, but the biggest was the scientific errors. My personal favorite was the clocktower, the shadow of which was supposed to fall on the location of some vital clue when the clock struck a certain time. However, what the writers failed to realize is that the Earth travels around the sun: the clocktower’s shadow would only fall in that precise location at that particular time of day once a year. How lucky for Nicolas Cage that he happened to show up just at the right time.

Ah, but it was a fun movie. Surprisingly few explosions (for a Bruckheimer film) but plenty of amusing banter and entertaining plot holes. It’s cheesy and formulaic, in that I called the Love Interest, the Witty Sidekick, and whenever something was about to explode or otherwise fall apart at the Worst Possible Moment, but National Treasure remains a solidly entertaining film.

The Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff

Posted by melydia on November 20, 2004 No comment

The Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff: The timing of this read was intentional. Mired in the chaos of NaNoWriMo, I knew I would need something that was not only calming, but nonfiction. There are those who prefer to read fiction to inspire or comfort them while in the midst of a major writing project, but I knew that it would be distracting – I’d either get caught up in the storyline (and forget where I was going with mine) or the writing style would serve as a constant reminder of what tripe I was producing. A gentle philosophy book starring a Bear of Little Brain seemed to be just what I was looking for.

And in that respect, it was. However, I was not so impressed with the ideas presented in this book. It seemed to spend too much time explaining why Confucianism (which it consistently referred to as “Confusion”), Knowledge, and Cleverness were not the correct paths in life. I disagree; I believe that everything has its proper place. Perhaps we put too much emphasis on the latter two, but shunning them completely is not the answer. Things do not magically fall into place by doing Nothing all the time. Trust me, I’ve tried it. It’s relaxing, to be sure, until things start falling apart and suddenly you have to become a “Busy Backson” to catch up.

This was not a bad book, to be sure, and I am open to the possibility that I missed the point entirely. It was light and fun and in fact quite Clever. Its biggest benefit, however, was to instill in me a desire to read the A. A. Milne tales that inspired Hoff to write this book in the first place.

Carl Melcher Goes to Vietnam by Paul Clayton

Posted by melydia on November 7, 2004 No comment

Carl Melcher Goes to Vietnam by Paul Clayton: I would summarize this book but the title does that job for me. It is the story of Carl Melcher, a recent high school graduate in the 1970s who gets drafted and sent to Vietnam. He makes some tenuous friendships, sort of falls in love, and seems at least vaguely affected by the war. This book would have been greatly improved had it been in a journal format, giving Clayton an excuse for being so trapped within Carl’s voice that things get lost. I often did not know how much time had passed between chapters, lost track of who was who, and missed what was going on because I did not understand the appropriate lingo. A diary format would have forgiven most of these problems as well as cleared up the time-jump confusion. If it was Clayton’s intent to paint a picture of pointlessness and bungling in the Vietnam War, he did a good job. But if he hoped to produce a thought-provoking critique of the war, a cast of sympathetic characters, or a moving tragedy, he did not accomplish his goals. Carl’s experiences in Vietnam were neither extraordinary nor detailed, and his limited use of adjectives (he felt only “scared,” “sad,” “happy,” or “angry” at any given moment) further distanced me from the story. In summary: this was not a bad book…just very forgettable.

Originally posted on Bookcrossing.

In defense of NaNoWriMo

Posted by melydia on October 27, 2004 No comment

A common question was brought up recently on the NaNoWriMo forums. First off, NaNo is a worldwide writing challenge to write 50,000 words of a novel in 30 days. That’s all. They don’t have to be brilliant and nobody has to read them. “Winning” NaNo (the only physical prize is a certificate you print off your computer) requires completing those 50,000 words, crappy or not, which are counted by a computer. The question was, of course, along the same lines as what my mother asked me last year: “Why don’t you write something of quality and send it to a *real* contest?” I wrote a response on the forums this afternoon which actually goes beyond the standard reply I usually give, which is, “the first step to writing well is writing at all.” I felt like reposting it here.

I’ve heard many many people scoff at the whole “quantity over quality” requirement, but I think those are the same people who have never left something perpetually unfinished simply because it did not turn out perfect that first go round. That right there is what NaNo helps fight. Stopping to agonize over every single sentence as you write stifles the creative process and lets loose your most heinous inner critic, so nothing ever gets done. Sure, there are people out there who go for the highest quality no matter what and don’t see the point of just getting a quick first draft DONE so all that’s left is editing. Those people don’t need second drafts. More power to ’em but I am not personally one of them. I need the deadline and I need the rough draft to work from. Stopping to doubt myself is self-defeating. Allowing myself to write crap ultimately also allows me to write beauty.

Really, that last sentence is everything. It all comes from the same spigot, after all. I can’t stop the cold water without stopping the hot as well. Just gotta let it flow. I’ll pick through it later.

Team America: World Police

Posted by melydia on October 24, 2004 No comment

Team America: World Police: In a word, funny. If you like watching marionettes get blown up, mauled, shot, and torn apart, this is the film for you. The political humor was also amusing as hell, and was much less partisan than I’d been expecting. In fact, there was a refreshing absence of Kerry and Bush. Its main point was that actors are no more relevant in the political scene than any of us unfamous schmoes, and there’s no reason to value their opinions more than anybody else. The parts that I found funniest, however, poked fun at action movies as a whole. The dialogue was fittingly silly and delivered with standard melodrama. The music really capped the whole experience, from the montage song (played over a montage) to the generic sappy patriotic country song reminding us that “freedom costs a buck-o-five.” If you are overly fond of Michael Moore, Alec Baldwin, or any of the politically mouthy Hollywood set, you might be offended by this movie. But come on: they’re puppets! Being blown up! That’s cinematic quality right there.

Zero to Lazy Eight by Alexander Humez, Nicholas Humez, and Joseph Maguire

Posted by melydia on October 23, 2004 No comment

Zero to Lazy Eight: The Romance of Numbers by Alexander Humez, Nicholas Humez, and Joseph Maguire: I like books about numbers. I like learning about origins of language. And, for the most part, I liked this book. You cannot read this expecting some overlying theme to it all, or even a nice neat conclusions section to wrap everything up. Each chapter is its own entity and is tenuously connected to a single number (zero through thirteen, plus an additional chapter on infinity). However, the narrative is tangential and digresses often into adjacent but not immediately applicable topics. For instance, chapter 5 is spent largely discussing the measurement of time. Is it an interesting collection of random information? No doubt. However, it’s nothing more than that. It is less a book than a collection of well-informed essays bordering on stream of consciousness. I had hoped for more explanation of common number-themed phrases, but I had no want for neat little facts on math and linguistics. If you’re just looking for some light nonfiction, this is a nice diversion.

Originally posted on Bookcrossing

The Face by Dean Koontz

Posted by melydia on October 13, 2004 No comment

The Face by Dean Koontz (unabridged audiobook read by Dylan Baker): The two main characters here are Ethan Truman, chief of security for megastar Channing Manheim, and Fric, Manheim’s lonely but surprisingly normal 10-year-old son. Ethan begins the story by investigating some strange packages delivered to his employer, which earns him a fatal shot in the chest…only to wake up back in his truck, unharmed but with his own blood under his fingernails. Also lurking in the wings is Corky Laputa, self-proclaimed anarchist and servant of Chaos, spreading fear and discord however he can.

When it comes right down to it, I enjoyed this book very much, thanks in no small part to Dylan Baker, the reader. His voice acting was convincing, his narration was engaging, and he managed to keep me interested – even rapt in parts – all 19 hours. However, I had a few complaints even Baker’s massive talent could not quell. First, the sappy ending: this being Dean Koontz, I knew that Good would triumph over Evil in the end, but the overly saccharine fate granted a character I didn’t care very much about in the first place was tiresome. Second, the flowery description: most of it was fun and useful in setting the mood, but there’s only so many times you need to describe the rain. Third, there were lots of lengthy details and backstory that weren’t necessary to the story. I have a feeling Reader’s Digest could trim this down to a novella and lose nothing.

Certainly not my favorite Koontz novel, but I may have to track down more audiobooks read by Dylan Baker.

Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow

Posted by melydia on September 20, 2004 No comment

Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow: We’ll start with my complaints. First off, the film, though fantasy, was set in 1939. Two historical inaccuracies jumped out at me: a reference to World War I (it would have been called The Great War at that point), and a knowledge of the dangers of radiation (if that was known, why were we testing atom bombs on our own soil for years hence?). Second, the homages to other films (James Bond, Laputa, and Star Wars, to name a few) were frequent and a little distracting. Third, there were huge plot holes (though I’ve been assured that that’s just part of the old school adventure genre), plus further evidence that replacing Jude Law with Ewan McGregor would be a vast improvement to any film. That said, there was much I liked about this movie as well. The visual effects were stunning, the action was exciting, and the humor was charming. The characters, though flat (also part of the genre), were entertaining and pretty (despite a flagrant underuse of Angelina Jolie). All in all, I felt like I was watching something on Turner Classic Movies: engaging and nostalgic, but still just a movie.

The Stainless Steel Rat Goes to Hell by Harry Harrison

Posted by melydia on September 17, 2004 No comment

The Stainless Steel Rat Goes to Hell by Harry Harrison: This is only my second Stainless Steel Rat novel, but I think I need to go back to the beginning and check out the first few in the series. Not only were there loads of characters and references to past events with which I was unfamiliar, this SSR story felt tired and forced. I felt like the author was just throwing in new twists and calamities for the heroes in order to boost his pagecount to novel length. There was no real flow to the plot and many of the events that either saved the day or ruined it seemed too convenient to be believable, even given a wide suspension of disbelief. Don’t get me wrong – I still enjoyed the SSR’s witty banter and sarcastic commentary, but overall I felt like the story was a little too aimless and random.